On the Importance of Self Love

Following long periods of thought, we all need to be cuddled and then feel choked by the overwhelming amount of information and emotion in our heads. The cycle includes overthinking and us eventually falling into the trap of self depreciation, whereas the real cure lies in the ability to reassure oneself in the abilities we have to keep going. Self love and its exercise doesn’t simply allow us to attract a lot of people as it is often framed in films and books by the lovable and confident characters; instead it offers every single one of us the unique ability to see our potential to keep going in the worst of times and not give up.

When you casually happen to feel down, be that because of bad weather or an upsetting personal situation, there is only so much your friends and cheerful music can do. As the day gets closer to the evening, thoughts seem to make their way back in and we feel overwhelmed and incapable of logical action. Recognising the value of oneself and the wonderful things you carry as an individual (be that through your personality or the little acts completed on a daily basis) makes your mind switch from negative to more positive. You feel on the right track: you feel happier.

Self love prevents reliance on anyone you might have consistently relied on in your life whilst seeing everything they do to make you happy. Their shoulder suddenly becomes free of your tears and stress and they smile with you rather than thinking of the fact that they are incapable of helping you. A disgustingly complex situation becomes more simple and tends to make more sense when you reassure yourself you can keep going and are determined to love yourself for who you are and what you do. You suddenly becomes surrounded by happiness and encouragement rather than the endless repetition of “sorry” which used to flow your way. People gravitate towards you and offer substantial help rather than the eventually useless comfort, which has been so helpful at the start.

Self love saves you from causing yourself damage when you wake up in tears at 2 am or 4 am due to anxiety or just uncertainty because of your own overwhelming thoughts. You can either sleep like everyone else, having accepted that you have done a lot of wonderful little things despite having made some mistakes or can battle anxiety very quickly and get some rest. You become calmer and more stable as the result of experiencing self love; you don’t feel the need to judge yourself and can live your life to its fullest extent with no regrets driving you into constant unhappiness.

Self love sounds like a little magical cure but how do you start to exercise it to make your life a more positive one?

  • When feeling down and prone to self depreciation whilst having nobody close to speak to, a pen and some paper are your best friends. Be that journaling or simply putting random words on the page, it all helps as long as you list down all of the wonderful attributes you have. If you feel like you have nothing think about your great smile, the fact that you have helped someone today or have even been able to start your journey of self love. Those minor, and as you might think insignificant things, have made today a better day, but by doing those things you are the person to have made today better. Show some appreciation - you deserve it.
  • If there is a close friend you trust enough, share what you like with them and they will be happy to help you. Chances are, your friend might have been in a similar situation and can tell you that you are an absolutely wonderful person because they most probably know how you feel and don’t want for you to be feeling down.
  • If you want to encourage self love in a friend writing them positive messages about why they have been so fantastic and why you value them so much is an incredibly handy way to make someone feel better and smile when they don’t feel too great.
  • Positive affirmations. This method has been recommended to me by a friend and it truly works wonders. If you tell yourself that you can do anything you will feel stronger and more encouraged to act despite having limited support by your side on some days.

Self love is not just an idea, but a way of both accepting yourself and progressing further, looking past stagnation and achieving a greater level of happiness in your life. Each person offers something wonderful, be that through who they are or what they do to make themselves and others happy - don’t forget about it and every day will be brighter.



  1. Beautiful and insightful - would like to see more in the future xx